Nuke Richmond (Long)

Since we are all in asbestos shorts/panties mode I might as well join in. My neighbors think I know all about new computers because I have a garage full of old computers. My most recent inquiries are similar to the following. Neighbor Q: I was trying to print a word document that I hadn't saved when my computer locked up. My Q: What else was running? Neighbor A: All this stuff that runs when my computer starts up. My Q: Any other programs? Neighbor A: Well I was also dialed into AOL and running Napster. Neighbor Q: Don't you have these same problems. My A: I don't listen to music when I program and I don't use Napster. My Q: When is the last time you purged any files? Neighbor A: Does it do it automatically? My Q: When is the last time you did a backup? Neighbor A: Does it do it automatically? My Q: Did you save the document? Neighbor A: Does it do it automatically? I just spent 2 hours typing and now I'm ready to print. When I'm finished editing I'll save the final copy. My A: Leave it alone and I'll look at it when I get a chance. I visit. My Q: Why do you have both Norton and Macafe antivirus running? Neighbor A: I need virus protection they start automatically. MY Q: Why do you have AOL, AIM, and MSN running? Neighbor A: Some came installed and I use AOL for access to internet, they start automatically. My Q: Why run Napster while you're typing? Neighbor A: I always listen to music when I type, the computer is closer than the stereo so I run Napster System has 25 GB disk, 256 MB memory and 56% of resources available, no keyboard response. My suggestion: Don't do more than 1 thing at a time and you will not have any problems. Neighbor Q: I though computers allowed you to do lots of things at the same time? Neighbor Q: I really want to play games, download music and listen to it at the same time MY Q: Do you want to burn CD's? Neighbor A: Yes MY Q: Do you want to scan pictures and print them? Neighbor A: Yes My A: Get a CRAY computer Neighbor Q: How much are they? I feel much better now that I've vented. People want a black box that works without them thinking, and that's what they have been promised by Dell, Gateway and Compaq. Mike mmcfadden(a)cmh.edu